


Same Sun, Another Sunrise

by Norash



Series: Dawn Changes [1]
Category: Eldarya (Video Game)
Genre: F/F, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-01
Updated: 2021-02-01
Packaged: 2021-03-18 14:01:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,006
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29119389
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Norash/pseuds/Norash
Summary: // Spoilers: set during Eldarya New Era, some references to episode 3 //Quite simply, she had given up.Why keep trying when she wasn't enough?When no matter how hard she tried, everything was too much.Seven years was too long.She honestly couldn't bridge the gap, the differences, the too many new situations and information.She stopped trying.She just wanted to help Eldarya again and hope to fade away like the first time.Only this time he would hope to never leave the crystal again.\\ I hope you can understand my story, please be merciful.|If someone could help me with any mistakes, I would be grateful.|
Relationships: Nevra (Eldarya)/Original Female Character(s)
Series: Dawn Changes [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2136621
Kudos: 3





	Same Sun, Another Sunrise

Same sun, Another sunset

She had long since finished her meal, but she was not moving.  
In front of her was the table with a plate on it now devoid of anything edible from the meal Karuto had created, set just for her in the huge, noisy canteen. 

Let it be clear, she felt like being alone today, as she had after all the many previous days. Leaving aside training with Jamon of course, she would never dare to skip a workout with him. 

Just today seemed the most opportune day, as there were no missions or tasks or requests to be done. 

He had declined invitations of all kinds: to go to the library; to the forge; to attend the evening that Karen and the others punctually organised at this time of the week. All, however, with some difficulty. 

As usual, when you decided you wanted to be alone, the whole world was against you and would find you even in the best hiding place. 

But here she was, finally at the end of dinner, just a few hours away from the impending arms of morpheus, which would finally end the day. 

But she didn't move. She watched, if anything. 

Honestly, was it better? To stay and observe, without intruding and creating the probable new problem. Because she had realised a few months ago that ever since she had woken up, more than five months ago, she had only made disasters. 

Some of them ended well, even leading to investigations into what was happening in Eldarya and what was threatening the peace of this world he now called home. But some definitely ended badly, where they always led to her next fight with someone or instilled doubt in her self. 

One only had to look at the tables around to list the most egregious. The strained relationship with Chrome and Karenn. Differences of thought with Huang Chu. The episodes of distrust she had shown towards Huang Hua. The constant visits to Ewelein's infirmary. The rather strained relationship with Mathieu. The non-existent relationship with Leiftan. (Strange how years locked up together didn't help between them eh?). 

But above the ranking of the worst of the worst? 

It wasn't even the tacit agreement of existence towards Lance, with whom he had to converse every now and then, eventually, hating whenever he understood why he was now trustworthy in being the current Captain of Obsidian. Or that he was slowly forgiving him, in memory of Valkyon. 

Oh no, the worst was seeing the many female companions sharing the table with Nevra. Seeing him so interested in them. Conversing with them. Laughing with them. When with her, any excuse was fair to argue for all the months she was back. 

But fortunately, only for the first few, because for the months after that she couldn't take it any more. 

She couldn't bear to feel the weight of the seven years she had rested and the world had moved on without her and Leiftan. 

She could no longer envy the decision her friend Daemon/Aengel had made. 

She couldn't stand being irritated every time she heard herself called a hero. 

She couldn't stand not having a refuge to run away to in the place she could call home. Because not even the cherry tree could be her escape route anymore, without the presence of those damned statues weighing her down. 

So she started to stop fighting for what she perceived she had before she woke up months ago. 

She stopped pretending those seven damn years weren't so damaging. Because they were. 

They had taken away his friendships, relationships, episodes, adventures and love. 

He blamed no one but time. 

It wasn't their fault that they had moved on. That his friends had grown up, that others had left and others stayed. 

That the glittering guard had changed so much, in a good way of course, but so much too abruptly for her. 

That what used to be her bedroom had been recycled for more suitable uses. 

That the city had to be rebuilt from the rubble, and that she felt an obligation to dedicate something to those she thought, the citizens, were their saviours. 

That the person he loved, loves, and will love perhaps all his life, had moved on. Because, again, although for her it seemed only yesterday that they were waking up in their room, in their bed, before the great battle, for him they were only distant memories. 

So, the only solution, was just, switch off. 

With everyone, no one excluded 

Continue the investigation. Help save Eldarya. Again. 

Sometimes, he hoped, dreamed, that at the end of it all, he could go back into the crystal. And stay there this time. 

There were many occasions, in the evenings especially when no one could see her, that she would enter the crystal room, sit in front of him and that would be it. You could say it was her new refuge, but it wasn't, if every time she hoped the crystal would swallow her up. 

Moreover, it was the same room that revoked her worst memories. 

It was the glances at the boys' table that distracted her from her thoughts. Chrome had pointed at it slightly, nonchalantly, perhaps to ask her companions to try to invite her back. 

So she was quick to grab her own plate and cutlery, leave them with the group of other diners and flee the cafeteria. 

Perhaps she really had to join the shadow guard, however stealthy she was becoming in order to avoid everyone. 

She knew it wouldn't be enough to hole up in her own room. So I set off out of HQ, past the lodge, the cherry tree, the gardens, everything to reach the outside of the walls. Once the den of the tree as well was a good hiding place, but by then he had discarded it too. Too obvious, too visible. 

Until he had discovered perhaps the one place where it seemed necessary to notice how much had changed. The beach. 

Same rocks, same boulders, same steep stairs, same view. 

Yes, the grass was showing signs of change, but acceptable. 

She sat down near the rock in the middle of the beach, witness to many events, perhaps the most important. 

She sat there, quietly, watching every tiny reaction of the sea in front of her. 

Despite being such an intrinsic place of memories, good or otherwise, she could hide from all the problems. Or so she thought. Sometimes she woke up the next morning with red eyes, and since she slept for an hour or so on those nights, it was not the walls of her room that witnessed her tears. 

Maybe it was the only place she really felt safe? There, alone, in the cold, where the salty smell soaked her skin, clothes, hair and soul. 

She didn't even change her clothes when she came here before going to sleep so as not to lose the smell of safety that this place gave her. 

What woke her up again that evening was the sound of footsteps coming from the stairs to the beach. 

It was certainly her seifaun, Valkyon. 

She had not been able to find a better name for him, but there could be none after seeing his eyes so similar to her precious friend. Perhaps the only one to whom seven years ago she had managed to say a proper farewell, in a way. 

And it was indeed him, when he turned his eyes to the now grown familiar. The problem was that he was not alone. He didn't know how to react to the presence of "the intruder'", but he restrained himself, at least, from holing up on the rock. 

Because the worst reason she was frightened, and the one that made her give up, was when she talked to the others and realised even more that they had changed and she couldn't bear it. 

Especially if the subject was the one who seemed to have had the most change of all. 

Who was staring at her with his lavender eyes. 

In a silence that seemed to want to break. 

<< You know... This was really the last beach I had left to figure out where you were hiding on these evenings. >>

Maybe it had to happen sooner or later. 

She wasn't going to be able to hold back in front of them much longer. 

But to collapse because the present Nevra was making a bad joke at her that in her head had superimposed the figure of a now past Nevra? That was too much even for her. 

So she collapsed there, in front of him, motionless like an animal in front of bright lights, in copious and silent tears. 

Immediately Valkion crouched down next to her, trying to distract her, or get her to come around. Every now and then he looked at his mistress and the other being there with them for help. But the other was motionless, worse than when he had glimpsed her before he decided to finally go down the stairs and join her. 

But when he didn't know how to react, the familiar crouched his head over his mistress' legs and waited. 

<< Why did you...? >> Nevra tried to point at her, with what looked like panic? Could he show it even without expressing anything on his face (at most the crucified eyebrows) and remain composed? Then like the familiar, I wait. 

<< Don't... Don't make jokes. >> You heard her sigh, not even seeing her compose herself. Seeing her let the tears wet her face as if nothing was wrong. << Just... Don't. >>

By now any expression from him was only deducible thanks to the almost eyebrows, such as their skeptical stance. 

<< Since I didn't do any at all, now you're complaining that I do? >>

<< We don't do that either>> she sighed again. 

<< What now?! Questions about your behaviour?! You're becoming a total no on everything like->> he was interrupted. 

< _> _

_Nevra was silent. They saw each other's eyebrows assume many positions. Demonstrating his near confusion about what to feel._

_In the end, however, like the familiar, he waited, this time for real. And he analysed the situation as he waited for the falls of her eyes to cease. He held back from approaching her and wiping his face as he would have done in the past. As his head had told him to do as soon as that cry had begun, but which he had decided not to do._

_The worst part was how the more he looked at her, the more she seemed to catapult him back to the past. Because she was the same in his eyes. Maybe that was what irritated him every time. Not just seeing Leiftan but her like this? So untouched by time, so noisy (for the first few months at least?) when he learned new news that was old news to him, so... As her memories remembered her?_

_But the new anger he aroused in her? Oh it was totally different. Seeing her yes, participating in missions, investigations, HQ...but turned off._

_Not even reacting to her arguments against Leiftan except to make them stop. The frustration of seeing her submit to Lance's presence in less than two weeks. (whether or not because of that sudden mission that took place after she had found out Lance was alive)._

_To acting like a soldier with no expressions and emotions like him. But without the 7 years of experience. Without everything he'd been through, but only needing two months in this new reality. Without struggling more, like when even the first week ever in this world she was screaming at the top of her lungs throughout HQ that she wanted a decent mattress._

_There it was, the rage that he hadn't been able to assuage these past few months was back._

_Because he knew it._

_Because he knew her._

_Because she was born to bicker._

_To get what she thought was right._

_Information._

_Respect._

_Admiration._

_Loyalty._

_Feelings._

_ << What are you. >> I spit, moving closer to her than the 8 meters that separated them. _

_ << ... An Aengel? >> He saw her puzzled. Finally, a pseudo emotion. _

_ << I didn't ask you what faeries you are. But what you are. Now answer me. >> _

_Perhaps she had understood his intentions? Perhaps she had frightened him? The fact was that he had seen her familiar get up and walk away from them._

_What's more, he finally got something real from Erika, even if it was only for a few seconds. A slight flame in her eyes. He had seen her even though she had immediately disappeared._

_ < _> __

__ << You wouldn't know it. Am I mistaken or do you do nothing but carry out missions? Am I mistaken or do you not speak to anyone? Am I mistaken or do you wake up, train, carry out orders and then repeat them! >> by now he was two feet away from her << Am I wrong or are you just an empty soldier in the hands of the guard?! >> _ _

__ <> there's that flame again. From so close, and as soon as she had risen to stand up to it, she could see it clearly. So small and dim and shiny because of those weeping eyes. _ _

__ << "Don't compare me to you! At least I'm trying something! I REACT!!! _ _

__ <> _ _

__ << ALWAYS BETTER THAN BEING AS EMPTY AS THE INSIDE OF A CIRCLE OF MUSHROOMS THAT WILL NEVER LEAD TO ANYTHING >> _ _

__ << I NEVER ASKED TO BE HERE! >> _ _

__ << OH YOU MEAN SO SILLY TO GO THROUGH A PORTAL WITHOUT REALIZING IT?! >> _ _

__ << I NEVER >> didn't even let her finish. _ _

__ << TO STAY IN THE GUARD AGAIN OF YOUR OWN CHOICE? ENLIGHTEN ME ERIKA!!! >> _ _

__ < _> __ _

___After a resounding "slap" everything went silent again._ _ _

___Broken by the sea. Broken by the crashing of the rocks. Broken by the slight groan of the familiar. Broken by the held breaths of the two._ _ _

___Broken by Nevra's almost unblinking eyes, staring at her pulsing, red cheek, her snow-white skin immobile with her face frozen after the blow._ _ _

___Broken by the shifting of the sand under her dragging footsteps, who, backing away, found the rock behind her to be the only remaining fortress to remain standing. Always she who had lowered her gaze. And began to breathe. And inspire. And breathe again. And again._ _ _

___Recovering, Nevra recognized the panic attack. Agi._ _ _

___ << Erika. ERIKA! Breathe with me! Follow my breathing! >> She took his hands and placed them on her chest << You can do it Erika, yes, breathe with me, with me. Inhale- >> he inflated his chest as much as he could with air << \- and exhale. >> I deflated it. _ _ _

___He saw her resisting, fighting him, continuing to hyperventilate. I try another approach._ _ _

___I put my face close to her ear, towards where her cheek was throbbing, to make her presence better felt._ _ _

___< < Breathe for me. Erika do it for me. Stay here and breathe with me. Please, Erika. Feel my breaths. >> he whispered. _ _ _

___He saw her react. Follow him. Relax. At last._ _ _

___ _

___ << Praise be to the oracle...keep breathing with me Erika. >> I blow in her ear, before sinking my head into her shoulder. << Like this. Very good. >> _ _ _

___When you finally heard her breathing normally, she relaxed for real. But she didn't want to give up her position. He didn't want her to see him like this. Decomposed. A figure he had struggled so hard to put on. Even though his voice betrayed him about how he really felt._ _ _

___ << I'm sorry Erika. I shouldn't have, I don't know what came over me. Please forgive me. Please. >> _ _ _

___There he was again, asking her forgiveness. Because he knew from experience that it would tear him apart if he didn't receive it._ _ _

___It was only because of the silence that surrounded them that he noticed Erika's murmuring._ _ _

___ << How? >> _ _ _

___ << What should I do >> he said in one breath, quickly. _ _ _

___Confused, he pulled back to look at her. Maybe it was one of the few times he could feel what she was really expressing, without filters, because he saw her continue._ _ _

___ << What should I do here Nevra, what can I do. What I cannot do. How to react. If I can react. PLEASE TELL ME BECAUSE I DON'T KNOW ANYMORE! >> _ _ _

___He didn't know how to answer her, like now when every time he saw her crying and didn't know what to do to stop it._ _ _

___ <> The more he heard her speak, the more he felt her hands grasp his shirt. Pulling on it. Holding her within his fists. He could feel what she was doing more than he could figure out how to answer her. << NONE OF YOU DESERVE...deserve.... Me. For me to come near you. Like a parasite. I don't deserve you... None of you Nevra... _ _ _

___ <> _ _ _

___ << Nevra. I didn't ask you that. >> _ _ _

___It was the night of silence, apparently. The most unnerving thing? It was that he usually silenced the others with words, not the other way around._ _ _

___ << I.... I have caused you nothing but pain. My being here has brought pain, after the first 5 minutes of discovering that hey, look, the crystal spit me out, good to see you again Erika. >> _ _ _

___The evening ended there. In every sense of the word. Because a few moments later the sun rose, again with them as witnesses._ _ _

___With one difference. Which Erika pointed out._ _ _

___ << "Sad how right she is. Don't you think? Our first sunrise was so... Beautiful, clear n the clouds sheltering from cold neo sky, while I had managed to summon a small sphere of light in my hands. You had a healthy Erika in front of you. Whereas now, you find yourself with a broken Erika, with a red dawn and with no clouds to shelter us from the impending cold that not even the sun will be able to make us pass. >> _ _ _

___With that said she and the seifuan disappeared, leaving the vampire there alone as he followed her with his eye as long as he could from his position. With the red sun rising behind him._ _ _

**Author's Note:**

> Ever since I started the 'new era' 'series', I've been having mixed feelings, playing episode 3 has further inspired me to do so. But let me be clear, mixed feelings in a positive way. That's all I want to say. Except that I'm still not sure there will be a sequel (50% likely, though I don't think many will read it) and a big thank you for wanting to read this ff.
> 
> With love, norash <3


End file.
